NEET Results: 5 Important Tips For Parents To Help Children Cope With Exam Result Stress

Whether you love it or hate it, exams are an extricable part of student life. Exams bring out the worst in us: anxiety, fear and excitement. But students may agree that some things can be worse than exams, like the exam results. It’s a testing time for most students who may feel either elated or despondent, depending on their scores. It’s natural to be dejected when one’s year-long struggles don’t bear fruits. But some students, fail to see beyond the setback and may resort to extreme steps. In the wake of NEET or National Eligibility Cum Entrance Test result declaration, two students have already committed suicide. A 19-year old from Dwarka, New Delhi and a 17-year old from Tamil Nadu took the extreme step after failing the qualifying test for medical and dental studies.

Many students turn to their parents for emotional support, but results and open houses can be tough on the parents as well. But instead of appreciating their children for their efforts, many parents project their own frustrations at them, making them feel bad about their performance. Dr. Era Dutta Consultant Neuropsychiatrist and Therapist at Mind Wellness & Fortis Healthcare says, “As parents, we want the best for our children. In testing times like these, parents should help their young ones cope with the constant anxiety that would inevitably happen for the next few weeks.” The doctor lists down five tips for parents to help their children pull through these tough times.

1 Appreciate Them

“It’s human nature to expect appreciation,” states Dr. Dutta. Family is the greatest source of support for the child, even if he or she has a hundred friends. Children turn to their parents, knowing that they will be accepted and loved unconditionally. “Sadly, most children who consult me say that while their parents appreciate their efforts, they still put a ‘but’ or a comparison in the end. They say, ‘Your marks are fine, but you can do better’ or ‘…but what about the others?’ This is the kind of semi-negative appreciation that pushes the children away.” Dr. Dutta advises parents to voice only positive supportive words in these testing times to their children.

2 Spend Time Together

What your child needs as much as your appreciation is your time. “Take some time out of your busy schedule to sit down with them. Your child may be getting ready to embark on his or her future. The expectations of ‘what’, ‘when’ and ‘where’ can be overwhelming. And if the results are not up to the expectations, your child may need you around to share his or her feelings with. Either way, don’t leave them alone,” advises Dr. Dutta.

3 Take Them Out

Be a model parent and do things differently. Not so long ago, a father from Madhya Pradesh threw a party for his son after he flunked his Class 10 exam. Now that’s something different. “Find a reason to rejoice. It doesn’t matter how good or bad your child’s results are. Take him or her out for a meal together, to either celebrate or forget the poor results. Either way, it is good to embrace it,” reckons the doctor.

4 Engage Them in Interesting Activities

Taking their mind off their results for a while is important. So help them engage in activities. Dr. Dutta opines, “For the next few days, ensure that your child engages in routine and certain other activities. Studies are important, but so are physical exercises and other hobbies. Encourage them to meet their friends, learn something new while there is still time. As the adage goes, ‘All work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy.’”

5 Invest in Plan B, If Needed

In life, seldom do things go according to our plans. That’s why it is important to have back up, just in case. “Invest in a Plan B if needed. If the result is not to you or your child’s expectations, work on a realistic, achievable backup plan. Encourage your child to take the exams again, or embark on another field of interest. If the parents are supportive and open-minded, children are less like to fall prey to depression and loneliness,” says Dr. Dutta.

Children don’t have the breadth of experience to understand that academic failure is only a small part of one’s life. Many famous people who have gone on to do great things in life weren’t achievers in school. There’s always a next time, and as parents, you have to give your children hope.

(The above story first appeared on LatestLY on Jun 05, 2018 05:30 PM IST. For more news and updates on politics, world, sports, entertainment and lifestyle, log on to our website latestly.com).