Every relationship hits a plateau after a point when the fiery excitement of the beginning fades. As time passes, it is easy to become passive and get more comfortable with your partner. But losing the lustre does not mean that you are destined for misery. Falling back in love is an intentional act and while you may not have that 'perfect' relationship, you can always refresh your bond when things don't go that smooth. Here are some tips to help you navigate your path back to love.
1 Leave the Ego Behind
Take a moment to figure out the problematic dynamics that contributed to the downfall of your relationship. Instead of playing the blame game, focus on the part of the relationship that you can control. Identifying mistakes is great but things will move towards the positive only when you take efforts to change your behaviour. Think about what you want from your partner and then ask yourself if you are living up to their expectations. If you are not, keep ego and pride aside and take the first leap toward change. Here's how to Make a relationship work with someone who has a different political view.
2 Spend Quality Time
Remember when you started dating, you could not maintain distance from each other? Create a space for your love and do it again. We tend to take our partners for granted once the honeymoon period is over. But don't let go off that. Plan your dates ahead and mark them on your calendar. You can also sprinkle in some exciting activities in between. It will be fun to experience new things together and they will make for great memories to look back on. Spend that quality time and the magic will happen again!
3 Ask About Their Needs
Sometimes when you feel disconnected from your partner, the issue is not lack of passion but the absence of resentment. So slow down and asses your partner's needs. Ask them if they are exhausted and see if you can do anything to meet that need. Responding to their needs can help them feel closer to you and in turn, make you feel closer to them. They will also appreciate the fact that you cared enough to ask them. However, if this exercise is a real struggle for you because of the numerous fights you have had, see a therapist who can work your needs together.
3 Just Talk
When was the last time you both just talked for hours like you used to like in the initial days of dating? So on a Friday, grab some wine and discuss anything and everything that comes to mind. It will feel like old times and you will remember how good it was to be able to talk to your partner about things other than your day. Set a bedtime so you both have some time for pillow talk every day. Teasing your partner playfully can make lasting strong bond.
Surprises don't mean extravagant gestures. Simply pack a bag of food and games for a relaxing afternoon in the park or fill up the living room with lit candles. Your partner will love it, whatever it is, because it shows thought. Also, spend your day with activities you used to love doing together. If you miss those days, bring them back! Some of those early feelings will resurface and it will be fun to reminisce.
Lastly, create a list of dream vacations you want to take with each other. It gives you both something to look forward to and work towards together, and get excited about the future.